Archive for October, 2006

Honey, I Want a Divorce

Tuesday, October 31st, 2006

Honey, I want a divorce
A married couple is driving along the highway doing a steady fourty miles per hour. The wife is behind the wheel. Her husband abruptly looks across at her, speaking in a clear voice, and says “Darling, I know we’ve been married for twenty years, but I want a divorce.”
The wife says [...]

Blonde Joke

Monday, October 30th, 2006

Blonde paint job

A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do.
“Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you [...]

Top Ten Reasons Why Trick Or Treating Is Better Than Sex

Thursday, October 26th, 2006

TOP TEN REASONS WHY TRICK OR TREATING IS BETTER THAN SEX

10) You are guaranteed to get at least a little something in the sack.
9) If you get tired, you can wait 10 minutes and go at it again.
8) The uglier you look, the easier it is to get some.
7) You don’t have to compliment the [...]

Little Johnnie Joke

Tuesday, October 24th, 2006

This little Johnnie Joke is hilarious!

Little Johnnie had terrible grades in school. So his parents decided to send him to a different school.
The same thing happened at this school - bad grades. They sent him to several different schools and still bad grades. So, as a last resort, they decided to [...]

10 things to smarten you up!

Friday, October 20th, 2006

10 things to smarten you up!
Thanks to Johnnie for sending me this hilarious list.. Number 8 Rocks! Soo true…
Have a Tasty Friday!
Jay

Number 10
Life is sexually transmitted.
Number 9
Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
Number 8
Men have two emotions: hungry and horny. If you see him without an erection, [...]

Here are a few things to think about:

Tuesday, October 17th, 2006

Many thanks to Johnnie for sending me this..

Can you cry under water?
How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
Why do you have to “put your two cents in”.. but it’s only a “penny for your thoughts”? Where’s that extra penny going to?
Once you’re in heaven, do [...]

Top 10 Things Samuel L. Jackson Might Say When He Plays a Jedi Master in the Upcoming Star Wars Movie

Friday, October 13th, 2006

These are great…

Top 10 Things Samuel L. Jackson Might Say When He Plays a Jedi Master in the Upcoming Star Wars Movie:
10. “You don’t need to see my goddamn identification, ’cause these ain’t the motherfuckin’ droids you’re lookin’ for.”
9. “Well, womp rat may taste like pumpkin pie, but I would never know, [...]

Funny King Kong Picture

Tuesday, October 10th, 2006

Hilarious picture. Gina, thank you for sending me this image

Retirement Planning

Monday, October 9th, 2006

If you had purchased $1000.00 of Nortel stock three years go, it would
now be worth $49.00.
With Enron, you would have had $16.50 left of the original $1,000.00.
With WorldCom, you would have had less than $5.00 left.
[...]